In recent months I started taking hot yoga classes. I wouldn’t call myself an avid fan but I do try to take at least one class a day. It’s rather interesting to see people of all sizes and shapes, mostly women, are sweating their butts off in an over-heated oven. Let truth be told - it’s not sexy at all, especially the hot yoga classes. Imagine being in a room temperature between 100 and 107 Fahrenheit; within a few minutes into the class you’ll be soaking wet and the sweating won’t stop until the class is over. That’s not sexy. That’s stinky!
I remember taking my very first hot yoga class. The instructor is a muscular Indian male. He stands by the door and greets everyone as they walk in. As soon as he starts addressing the class I panic. It may seem like he’s speaking English but I have troubles understanding it. It’s a cross between Indian and English – a whole different language on its own. It sucks being a newbie in the class because I have no idea what’s going on whereas everyone is familiar with the routine. It’s frustrating already since my body can’t perform such seemingly simple poses and even more frustrating to find older women in the class who can do all the movements so gracefully. My body is tired after the class. And some of the older ladies I’ve seen in the yoga studio take 2 or even 3 classes a day! How in hell do they have all this energy? It makes no sense at all. They certainly are living the fabulous lifestyle. They take a morning class, shower afterwards and then off to a light meal with friends. Then they return in the afternoon for a mid-day session. Don’t they ever get tired and burned out?!
So, what’s up with this craze for yoga in recent years? I think that people turn to yoga for various reasons. Some aim to lose weight and get in shape. Some do it as a daily workout regimen. Others practice yoga for the purpose of meditation.
As for me I include it in my daily schedule and make it an important part of my life just like eating, sleeping and enjoying life. To me it’s a form of self-discipline, a practice to stay focused and a training to make a person humble. Daily yoga exercise allows me to be in touch with my own body and through the practice of each movement I become more self-aware of tension and stress. In other words I discover muscle groups that I didn’t know about and teach myself about my own anatomy.
Once upon a time the health club was a good place to meet potential prospects. Maybe yoga studio is the new meat market. I once dated a guy who ended up marrying a woman he met in a yoga class. That’s just beautiful. So he bent down, looked up and all he saw was her bootylicious rear-end. He went up to her after the class, got her digits, asked her out and the rest is history. That’s not really what happened. I just made it up.
The reality is that it’s rare to even spot men in yoga classes and when they show up they are usually accompanied by their girlfriends/ wives. So this fallacy about meeting dating potential in a yoga class is giving false hopes to the wishful thinking women. However, if you’re a single man and you enjoy yoga, you’ll be treated as the endangered species and all the ladies can’t wait to get their hands on you so that they can nurse you with tender love care.
On the other hand there are a lot of male yoga instructors. If women set out to meet prospects they will be the ones. And often times women will hover around their male instructors before and after classes. Back in the good old days there used to be endless scandals between personal trainers and their clients. I wonder if anything steamy ever occurs between male yoga instructors and female students.
The most interesting thing I’ve noticed in yoga class is that women do come in all kinds of odd sizes and bizarre shapes – this is beauty in its purist and unique form because no two bodies are exactly alike. And after seeing various body shapes I’ve become more forgiving about my own. This is the real world. I’ve seen an older woman with the most elegant upper torso but her bottom is so wide and round that Sir Mix-A-Lot will be singing on top of his lung: “Baby Got Back!” I’ve seen a young lady with a gorgeous face and slender legs but her overflowing breast can help feed the hunger children around the world.
Now I’m a firm believer in the art of dressing up. Flaws can be forgotten if you know how to flaunt your assets successfully. When you walk into a yoga class all covers have to come off and there’s no place to conceal your not-so-flattering attributes. This is the naked truth. What struck me the most so far is this young lady with bad acne on her buttocks. I’m just curious, how does she pop those zits?
Here comes an issue that quite a few of my non-Taiwanese guy friends have brought up with me. There has been complaints about Taiwanese women don’t shave their pubic hair and it’s growing to be the Amazon rainforest down there. That makes oral performance very challenging! Let’s face it. SHAVING is not something we learn in school. I see lots of women in yoga classes with bushes in their armpits and long body hair on their forearms and legs. To them it’s absurd to shave because no one ever teaches them to do so. I have a friend who has body hair phobia and he’ll probably go nuts if he ever visits my yoga class where 75% of the women do not embrace shaving as personal hygiene.
So, I wonder, since when did women start shaving their legs, underarms and bikini areas?
