First, I love a man who can make me laugh and know how to cheer me up when I’m feeling the blue. A great sense of humor is a gem.
He is a man with goals, plans and ambitions. He has what it takes to make his dreams come true. And he is eager to do everything in order to bettering his life.
You see, I have total respect for any man as long as he has dreams and he makes plans to make them happen. It is hard for me to have high regards for a man who has no mission in life. Having a father who built everything on his own makes me look up to anyone who can visualize their dreams and turn them into reality.
I have always dated men who not only kept their day jobs but also looked for ways to venture out for more. Back then, my Mr. Big was more than just a banker. He had investments and he was making good money from it. He literally had double incomes. He taught me a lot about how to invest smart and offered great tips. Again, he earned my respect by doing simply what he was good at.
Respect has to be earned, not given.
So, it is more than a financial status. Maybe social status matters to me as well as financial stability. If two people can’t be better when they are together (finance-wise), then I don’t see the point of getting married. I have to settle for less in order to be married so that I can rough it? Hell No!
Well, the materialistic needs are just as important as personality characteristics. I’ve grown up a certain way and it’s unlikely that I’m going to give it up. Let’s face it. It is shallow and materialistic but god darn it, I want to marry well.
Again, a man’s income reflects on the ambitions / drives he has. If he is satisfied and content with everything he has, that’s wonderful. How much is enough changes from person to person.
The criteria of my dream man probably have become more materialistic and shallower over the years. Call me a snob. I can’t deny it because it’s part of who I am. My parents didn’t invest tons of money and raised me a certain way so that I can marry a man with no obvious promising future.
I never considered myself a picky person until recently. Once I laid out everything I want in a relationship, I realized that I’m just plain difficult. Every so often, I beat myself up for being this way, which may have resulted in my forever-single status. Many friends assure me that I’m not shallow. Obviously, they share the same values as I do. Perhaps deep down, they look for the same materialistic things. They are not as verbal and candid as I am.
In my heart, I always want to believe in my man and think that he is surely and slowly making changes toward bettering his life for what lies ahead. I won’t mind waiting if he shows sincerity and stamina. After all these years matching my name to different last names, I have a clear idea of what suits me.
“Wine and Dine” is one of the keys to my heart. Baby, I don’t know about you but damn! I love the high life!
Let’s sum it up. I am looking for a man who’s established with a social status, stable financially, and most importantly, a man who desires the finer things in life and has the ambitions to make them come true. That’s not too much to ask, is it?
Dating is like a box of chocolate. You never know what you’re going to get and whom you are going to meet next. Some are great. Some are so-so. Some are horrendous. Some even have terrific chemistry with me. A few are plain nightmares. Everything happens for a reason and every person we meet throughout our lifetime is destiny.
Speaking of great loves, I had two, including Mr. Big. In retrospect, they gave me the closest thing to true love. Mr. Big had great appreciations for all things Asian (and I’m not just talking about the food!) and high regards for Chinese cultures (I’m proud of my root!). He’s worked for two Taiwanese-owned banks in L.A. one after another. I am not sure if you can teach a man how to possess sophistication. He has it or none at all. A sophisticated man is very attractive!
JC probably fared well because we both can converse in English, Mandarin and Taiwanese. Our bi-cultural backgrounds make things more interesting.
Neither of my great loves cared much for clubbing and it was fine with me. It was more fun going without them since they probably danced like robots. It was certainly a plus if my man could hang and love to boogie down when I was in the mood.
There are men who would have been okay choices of boyfriends if I were a 20-something in college. They are all about having fun, which is their only goal in life.
I’m glad that I never kept the same boyfriend for more than 2 years. Otherwise, I would never have the chance to ‘explore’ and really find out for myself what’s out there, what I like and what I loathe when it comes to dating.
Quite a few of my friends who are married sometimes regret for not dating enough before settling down. Now they think about what they may be missing. They are not sure as of what stopped them from having a little fun back then. I certainly won’t have that problem. I’m an opportunist. LOL.
A friend’s mom runs a Chinese cooking school in the Midwest. Her dating advice for Asian girls like me is to ask two questions: (1) Is he interested in Chinese cultures? (2) Does he like sports?
She is not crazy but her point is that, since she is in the retail business selling oriental gifts, she knows a lot of customers who are in mixed (Asian + White/Black/Latin) couples. She notices that when the non-Asian person has a longstanding interest in Chinese culture, the relationship tend to last. She explains, "It's very difficult when you're married to someone who doesn't want to eat your food."
True that! If my man is a sports fanatic, I might begin to resent it after a while! I like NFL but I have zero interest in NBA or MLB.
I believe in Go with my heart and Trust my own intuition. Good things always happen when I least expect it. Therefore, I’m more likely to meet someone special when I am not looking. Dating is all about destiny, isn’t it? My philosophy in life has always been “Take things as they come and just roll with the punches.”
Does anyone know if Russell is still single & available?!?! He is quite ideal as a future mate!
